Taking Up the Cross and Pledging My Life to Follow the Lord

By Chen Xu

In 1978, I believed in the Lord in the Three-Self Church. Since the state didn’t approve of our belief, we had to attend meetings cautiously and secretly. In 1980, I read from the newspaper that the policy of freedom of religious belief was introduced by the CCP. I felt very excited at this news, thinking: The policy of the state is good now and people can enjoy the freedom of religious belief. This is a good country that turns away from the evil way. Later, the CCP set up the National Committee of the Three-Self Patriotic Movement of the Protestant Churches (self-government, self-support, and self-propagation). I also began to take the path of loving the country and the church, and became the leader of the local Three-Self Church.

I Left the Church After Knowing the Inside Story

In 1988, when I was attending theology classes in the first semester in my province, Director Fan from the Provincial Party Committee, who was responsible for religious affairs, revealed a piece of information while giving a lesson to us. He said, “Why does China implement the policy on freedom of religious belief? Its doing so is completely because of the pressure of circumstances. First, without the freedom of religious belief, a nation is not qualified to attend the United Nations General Assembly, which means, if the Chinese government doesn’t allow freedom of religious belief, it won’t be able to win a seat in the UN. And in that case, all other countries will look down upon China, which will be a disgrace to the Chinese government. So the government has no alternative but to carry out the policy of freedom of religious belief. Second, before the liberation of China, the United States bought much land in Mainland China on which churches, schools, and hospitals were built. If the Chinese government doesn’t allow freedom of religious belief and forbids the Chinese people to believe in the Lord Jesus, the United States will reclaim all these properties, and at the same time the Chinese government will have to cover the full cost of them. Since the Chinese government can’t afford the compensation, it has to agree to allow freedom of religious belief.” I was astonished to hear this news and even couldn’t believe it. It turned out that allowing freedom of religious belief was not out of the CCP’s own will but for having a position in the world. Wasn’t this deceiving the Chinese people? Afterward, I saw that although the CCP claimed freedom of religious belief, there was a scope for it, and that the Three-Self Church had been completely under the control of the CCP. After seeing this through, I left the Three-Self Church and joined a house church in early 1994.

The Evil Cops Searched My House, and More Than 70 Christians Were Arrested

On April 16, 1996, I ran a seminary course in my house, intending to hold a seven-day Bible class. At that time, there were more than 100 brothers and sisters attending the class. On the evening of April 18, all the police of the Town Police Station were mobilized and surrounded my house. Then a group of evil cops broke into my house like bandits and rummaged through boxes and chests. In a short while, they ransacked all the rooms, turning my house into a mess. At last, they took away 800 yuan and two antiques which were handed down to me by my grandmother. My mother hid herself in the corner with fright, not daring to speak. My wife and some brothers and sisters managed to flee by the small side door. When she returned at about one o’clock in the morning, she dared not enter the house because the CCP cops were still there. In the end, the cops took me and more than 70 brothers and sisters, as well as 38 bicycles and over 40 quilts they confiscated, to the police station. Later, other brothers and sisters were released after paying a 2,000 yuan fine each, and three brothers and I were detained.

I Was Released From the Labor Camp After Being Fined 4,000 Yuan

In the detention house, they forcibly searched us and pocketed 300 yuan that they found on me. During that period, they interrogated me four times, and said, “You do not go to the church designated by the state but have gatherings secretly at home. You’re breaking the law and acting against the CCP!” I responded, “Doesn’t the state proclaim freedom of belief? I didn’t break the law by believing in the Lord Jesus. On what charges do you arrest me? Although I didn’t go to the Three-Self Church, I am also a Christian.” Then they asked me, “Do you know XX? He is a great leader of the Shouters. You’re in the same gang. You believe in a cult. You can’t deny it.” I knew that I couldn’t be a Judas to sell out brothers and sisters, so I didn’t say anything.

Afterward, they detained us for half a month on the charge of believing in a cult, and then put us into the labor camp for over twenty days. It was not until I was put into the prison did I come to know how the CCP treated the prisoners: For each meal, we were only given a small steamed bun and a spoon of soup. The prison guards and the heads of the cell were the kings here. If we did anything unsatisfactory to them, they would abuse or beat us as they wanted. One day, when we went downstairs for exercises, the head of the cell rushed to Brother Wang and beat him without any reason. I saw that instead of treating us as humans, the CCP just treated us as animals they could abuse and tools to alleviate their boredom. I was very resentful at this, thinking: We just practiced Christianity at home and didn’t violate the law. Why do you shut us here living a life worse than that of pigs and dogs? The more I thought, the more upset I became. How I wished I could leave this disgusting place at once. At this time, I remembered the Lord’s words, “And he that takes not his cross, and follows after Me, is not worthy of Me” (Matthew 10:38). Through the enlightenment of the Lord, I came to realize: My being arrested today is permitted by the Lord. It is inevitable to be persecuted when believing in God in China, an atheistic country. If I want to believe in God and follow God, I must take up the cross and walk the way that the Lord has prepared for us. This is the way once walked by the Lord and personally opened up by Him. In order to save us mankind, even the Lord, with an innocent flesh, suffered a lot and was nailed to the cross. Shouldn’t I, a sinner, suffer more? While thinking of this, I had faith and was full of power, and I was determined to pledge my life to follow the Lord regardless of how much suffering I had to undergo. At last, failing to get anything from us, the CCP cops fined each of us 4,000 yuan on the charge of “disturbing the social order,” and released me twenty days later.

I Was Arrested at the Station

On the afternoon of October 28, 1998, I went out of town to attend a co-worker meeting. When I arrived at the station and was about to get on the bus, several cops rushed to me and dragged me down, and then took me to the police station. They took away several hundred yuan from me and impounded my bag, clothes and the Bible. After that, they shut me in a room. The sudden arrest reminded me of the miserable prison life last time, and I was somewhat nervous in my heart. Since it was the second time I got arrested, I knew they wouldn’t let me off easily. In such an environment, I kept praying to the Lord in my heart, “O Lord, there’s Your good purpose in my being arrested today. You’re my strong rock and my ever-present help. May You help me overcome the afflictions and tortures of the devil, and keep me from being a Judas and selling out brothers and sisters. I’m willing to give up my life to follow You and bear testimony for You. May You give me faith and power. In the name of the Lord Jesus. Amen!” After the prayer, I remembered a hymn that we often sang in our gatherings—I need Jesus, “I need Jesus, I need Jesus every day; Need Him in the sunshine hour, Need Him when the stormclouds low’r.…” With the Lord’s presence, I calmed down a lot.

Later, the police station reported the news of my being arrested to the Public Security Bureau, saying that they had caught a senior leader of the Shouters. Then the Public Security Bureau immediately went to search my house, taking away the Bible, various kinds of spiritual books, and the devotional notes I took when I studied theology. They also took away more than 2,000 yuan from my house. That night, two chiefs from the Political Protection Section of the Public Security Bureau went through the imprisonment process with me. After that, a prison guard led me to the cell and said to the head of the cell, “This is a great leader of a cult.” Saying this, the prison guard winked at the head of the cell, and then the head of the cell and other prisoners immediately abused me, “Why do you believe in a cult and act against the CCP? You’re looking for trouble, aren’t you?” In the face of the prisoners’ ridicule and insult, I could do nothing but pray to the Lord in my heart.

Facing the Heads of Evil Cops, I Looked Up to the Lord and the Lord Bestowed Upon Me Courage and Faith

Early next morning, the prison guard handcuffed me and clothed me in the prison “yellow jacket,” and then brought me to a room about the size of three normal rooms. Upon entering it, I felt it was so gloomy. I saw the chief of the Public Security Bureau, the chief of the Political Protection Section, and the captain of the National Security Team, and in the middle of them sat the Minister of Public Security. I felt astonished while seeing tableware and beds there. For I had never thought that the police of the Political Protection Section would live in the detention house to interrogate me, and that I, an ordinary religious believer, could alarm so many government officials and cause them to make such efforts. In many years of believing in the Lord, I had never gone beyond moral bounds and never done anything unlawful. However, just because I didn’t believe in the Lord within the scope prescribed by them, I enjoyed such a “generous treatment.” That was just incredible! In the past, I always thought that the state policy was good, and that people could enjoy the freedom of belief. At this moment, I couldn’t help feeling indignant: Oh! The state does not allow the freedom of religious belief but restricts it. How blind I was to believe the lies of the CCP. Thinking back, the CCP had been cracking down and persecuting religious belief since the establishment of the nation. Many believers, due to the arrest of the CCP, had no safe place to stay and enjoyed no freedom. During the Cultural Revolution, Pastor Han in my local place was publicly criticized by the CCP thirteen times and paraded through the crowded streets in steeple-crowned hats for his belief in the Lord. There was also a preacher, Mr. Wei, who was labeled as a counterrevolutionary, and condemned as a spy. Under the suppression of the CCP, their sons couldn’t get wives due to their family backgrounds. Thinking of this, I felt indignant in my heart. When I saw the ferocious looks on the faces of the vicious policemen, I couldn’t help feeling nervous. I thought: Since they take this matter so seriously, they won’t let me off easily. I felt afraid in my heart, and immediately prayed to the Lord Jesus, asking Him to give me courage and faith. Then I remembered the Lord Jesus said, “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear Him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matthew 10:28). The Lord Jesus’ words made me full of power and faith. I firmly believed that my life was in God’s hands, and I wouldn’t die without God’s permission. Then I made a resolution to pledge my life to stand the testimony for the Lord. At this time, the Minister of Public Security asked, “Where do you usually go to attend the co-worker meeting? Which provinces do your co-workers come from?” No matter how he questioned me, I just gave no answer. Seeing this, four or five evil cops put up their fists and came for me. One of them said, “This is Minister Bai from the Public Security Ministry. If you dare refuse to answer his questions, we’ll beat you to death.” Since I had committed my life into God’s hand, whatever they asked me, I just kept silent all along. Seeing that I didn’t say anything, they sent me back to the cell.

They Interrogated Me by Cruel Tortures but Gained Nothing

In the afternoon, they again brought me to the interrogation room. Before I could keep my balance, a tall evil cop kicked me to the floor fiercely and ordered me to kneel down. Another evil cop took out a stick with four edges and gave me a head-on blow, and immediately the stick broke in half. Then he took out another one and struck my head hard. I felt dizzy, and with a sudden rush of blackness, I fainted to the ground. When I just came to myself, several tall evil cops held me and took off my cotton jacket. They then handcuffed me behind my back, and stuffed two beer bottles under the handcuffs, and then rotated the bottles with force. While doing this, they cursed, “Aren’t you capable? Aren’t you tight-lipped? You dare disregard the questions from Minister Bai. You’re courting death! I haven’t seen anyone who can walk out of here without confessing. We’ll torture you to death today! We’ll see whether you speak up or not!” At that time, my arms were so painful as if they were broken, and I broke into a cold sweat. In the midst of pain, I prayed to the Lord, “O Lord, You bestowed life to me. I only wish to commit myself into Your hand. May You give me faith and power so that I can overcome the cruel tortures. Please keep me from being a Judas and selling out brothers and sisters.” When I really couldn’t bear the pain, I cried out loudly, “O Lord, may You receive my soul.” The Lord Jesus showed me mercy when I prayed and called to Him. Seeing that I could barely hold on, the evil cops loosened my handcuffs for a while. This allowed me to see the great power of the Lord. I thanked the Lord for His protection and had more faith in my heart. A while later, the cops handcuffed me again and tortured me until six or seven o’clock in the evening.

After supper, the same group of people took turns to interrogate me throughout the night, and each time two of them interrogated me for two hours. They handcuffed me and ordered me to take off my cotton jacket and sit on a block of cold stone specially prepared for the prisoners, while they all wore coats and some even wrapped themselves with quilts. They took turns to have a rest but did not allow me to sleep. Being interrogated the whole night, I was too sleepy to open my eyes. As soon as they saw me close my eyes, they would lash me with a whip and beat my head with a stick. If I lowered my head, they would scold me ferociously, “Are you praying to your Lord?” Thank the Lord for His keeping! I didn’t yield to them no matter what means they used. Finally, as they failed to gain the information they wanted through days of interrogation, they changed to the soft tactic.

They Switched to Soft Tactic

Once, when they interrogated me again, they changed their former ferocious looks and said to me falsely, “Say, who is your leader? Who are your co-workers? Where are they from? What are their names? Where do they live? Just tell us! It will only take you three or five minutes, and soon you will be free. Then we’ll go our own way, and you also don’t need to suffer all night anymore. Isn’t this good? Or you can call your co-workers to come here and we will provide accommodations and food for them. We’ll just have a meeting with them, and as long as they promise they won’t act against us, we’ll release them immediately. You know, the policy of the CCP is to be lenient to those who confess, and harsh to those who resist. So the wise option is to cooperate with us.” I was very indignant at their nonsense, thinking: Have I not suffered enough tortures and afflictions from you during these days? I will by no means let brothers and sisters suffer your tortures. I have already seen through your hypocrisy! Then I prayed to the Lord in my heart, asking Him to protect me so that I could guard against Satan’s schemes and not fall into their trap. At that time, I remembered the Lord’s words said, “And when they bring you to the synagogues, and to magistrates, and powers, take you no thought how or what thing you shall answer, or what you shall say: For the Holy Spirit shall teach you in the same hour what you ought to say” (Luke 12:11-12). I found the direction from the Lord’s words and prayed to Him: Oh Lord! I’m willing to rely on You to overcome the afflictions of the devils. And no matter how they tempt me, I’ll just ignore them. When they interrogated me again and asked me who my head was, I thought: Man cannot be the head. Only the Lord Jesus is our Lord and our God. At this point, I replied, “We don’t have the head for only the Lord Jesus is the head of mankind.” They were rendered speechless after hearing my answer. Then they asked me, “Who is your leader? Who conducts the meetings?” I knew I couldn’t sell out brothers and sisters no matter how they questioned me, so I said, “I am the leader and I conduct the meetings.” Dissatisfied with my answer, they continued to ask me, “Answer our questions honestly! Tell me, who attended the meeting? Where are they from?” “I don’t know,” I replied. Then they flew into a rage and showed their ferocious looks, saying, “You don’t know? Okay. You’ll know it when we torture you.” Immediately, four or five big guys rushed to me like hungry wolves hunting for food. They surrounded me and beat and kicked me. Then they handcuffed me behind my back and pulled ropes around me. As I still refused to yield to them, they continued to torture me …

My Big Toe Being Wounded by the Evil Cops, the Lord’s Words Gave Me Faith and Power

Once in particular, several evil cops bound me tightly with ropes. Then one of them stomped savagely on my big toe with the heel of his shoe and crushed it. All at once, a piece of flesh on my big toe fell off, with blood streaming from it. It was so painful that I couldn’t help trembling all over and screaming, but they didn’t care about my life or death at all. After the interrogation, I ached terribly and couldn’t move. Seeing that I really couldn’t walk, they dragged me back to the cell like dragging a corpse. At that time, I felt my whole body was aching, especially the big toe, to the extent that I felt cold all over. A feeling of sorrow stole over me: Oh! How much longer do I have to endure this suffering before it ends? How will they torture me tomorrow? I really don’t want to stay in this devilish place for a single moment. I would rather be beaten to death than be tortured like this. The more I thought about it, the more upset I felt. I was especially weak in my heart, so I prayed to the Lord silently, “O Lord, I’m weak now. May You enlighten me and make me understand Your will. Please give me faith and power so that I can stand testimony for You. I pray in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ! Amen!” After the prayer, a passage of the Lord’s words appeared to my mind clearly: “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for My sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you” (Matthew 5:10–12). The Lord’s words gave me faith and made me realize: My being arrested today by the CCP evil cops is permitted by the Lord. It’s even more the Lord’s grace that I can experience the hardship in prison. That I suffer persecution for my belief in the Lord is a glory and a blessed thing. At this time, the pain of my body was gradually relieved. Then I remembered those saints who were martyred for God’s work and gave up their lives to do God’s will: James was beheaded, John was sawed, Peter was crucified upside down, Stephen was stoned to death…. Their sufferings were approved by the Lord and their sacrifices were remembered by God, and they were the examples I should follow. Compared to the sufferings they underwent, what I was enduring was too small to mention. The Lord’s words gave me faith and power, and led me out of weakness. So I made up my mind: To defend the true way, I will fight against the devil Satan even at the cost of my life, and stand testimony for the Lord till death.

The Evil Cops Used Me to Hunt Brothers and Sisters, and I Dealt With Them With Wisdom

One day in February 1999, the evil cops had me put on prison clothes and handcuffed, and brought me to a yard where two police cars parked. I wondered: What tricks are the evil cops going to play? I immediately called to the Lord in my heart, asking Him to keep me so that I could see through their schemes, stand the testimony and not sell out brothers and sisters, and could glorify the Lord’s name. A while later, they pushed me into the car, and I then realized that they were taking me to hunt brothers and sisters. I was determined in my heart that I would rather die than sell out any brother or sister. I prayed to the Lord silently, “O Lord, the Lord who is in the heavens and on earth and among all things, You are the Almighty who is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent. The evil cops wish to use me to arrest brothers and sisters. May You guide me, help me, and bestow upon me wisdom so that I can see through Satan’s scheme and bear testimony for You. Amen!” After the prayer, I felt secure in my heart and wasn’t nervous anymore. Then an evil cop said to me, “You’d better cooperate with us today. If you behave well, you can atone for your crimes and go back home to reunite with your wife and children earlier. As your children are still young and all your family rely on you, you’d better listen to us!” I thought: I’ll never listen to your lies. Afterward, they drove to a city in another province to work with the local police, planning to use me to identify brothers and sisters so that they could arrest them. In the car, the evil cop said to me, “Once you find any of your brothers and sisters, don’t get out before we act. Just tell us where they live. And we’ll take care of the rest. Don’t worry. We promise we’ll keep it secret and never reveal your identity. No one will know it is you.” After hearing their nonsense, I responded to them inwardly, “I won’t fall into your schemes and let your intrigues succeed. I would rather die than render a service to you devils!” Afterward, that evil cop asked me, “Where do you usually go when you work here?” “I become disoriented once I go out, so I don’t know which way to go,” I replied. “So how do you go to the meeting place?” he asked. “They asked me to go to a club and someone would wait for me there,” I responded. “Okay. Let’s go to the club,” he said. When we got to the club, they asked me, “Where should we go next?” I pointed to the left side and said perfunctorily, “This way.” They said, “Okay. Let’s go.” They drove around the city and even drove to a wheat field in the country. Finally, after driving around for a day, they returned without any result.

The Evil Cops Got Exasperated and Treated Me Ruthlessly as Their Schemes Failed

After we returned from outside, the head of the police station brought me to the interrogation room and ordered me to kneel down. He handcuffed me behind my back and tied my hands with ropes. Then he stomped on my calves with his feet and pulled up my arms with force. I ached unbearably from the torture and almost fainted. I cried loudly, “O Lord Jesus, may You receive my soul.” Then, eight big and tall evil cops rushed up to me like ferocious wild beasts, and gave me wild beats and kicks, taking me as their target to practice martial arts. After beating me enough, they took off my clothes and bound me with rope. Shouting a chant, they pulled the rope on both sides, and yelled “Ha!” in unison. Then the finger-thick plastic rope broke with a bang. One evil cop said, “We have plenty of ropes. Take another one!” Then he took out another rope, and tortured me the same way as before. Since they had taken off my cotton jacket, the rope almost cut into my flesh. I felt heart-piercing pain and broke into a cold sweat. In a short while, the sweat wet a large area of the floor. They kept torturing me in this way until eight o’clock in the evening. I was exhausted from the tortures and felt limp all over. An evil cop then asked me, “Now tell me, can you lead us to them? If you can, we’ll go and get them tomorrow. Otherwise, we’ll send you back to the cell.” “No way!” I responded firmly. They came to their wits end, and then pushed me into the car and drove me back to the cell late that night. When I arrived at the detention house, all the prisoners had fallen asleep. Being tormented for a whole day without eating or drinking anything, I ached unbearably all over and couldn’t get to sleep. At that time, I thought of the scenes when I read the Bible and praised the Lord with my brothers and sisters, and I felt a warm flow warmed my heart. How I wished I could still be together with them singing hymns to praise the Lord and living in the bosom of the Lord. How wonderful the life of that time was! I called to the Lord Jesus in my heart again and again, and fell asleep unconsciously.

The next day, they brought me to the interrogation room again. As their scheme of arresting brothers and sisters failed, and they gained nothing after dispatching two police cars to another province and paying much price, they even more hated me to the core. To vent their hatred, they treated me with more cruel means. They beat and kicked me, handcuffed me behind my back and stuffed beer bottles there again. They also abused me with many evil and dirty words, and rumored that I was a counterrevolutionary who opposed the CCP. When I could hardly bear the pain from their torments, I shouted loudly, “O Lord, I thank and praise You! I have never opposed the CCP!” My shout was so loud that everyone in the whole detention house could hear it, and it even brought in the leader of the detention. Then the evil cops put me down for a while, saying, “See! The leader shows concern for you and even comes to see you. You’d better speak up, and then you’ll be released.” I felt disgusted at their words, thinking: If it had not been for the Lord’s protection, I would have been tormented to death by you. Afterward, no matter what kind of measures they used, they still failed to get any useful information from my mouth.

My Life in the Labor Camp

It was not until May 28, 1999 that I was relieved from the seven months’ interrogation and cruel tortures. At last, the CCP sentenced me to two years of hard labor on the charge of “disturbing the social order and taking part in a cult,” and then sent me to the labor camp. During the seven months, I suffered countless beatings, my body covered with scars.

In the labor camp, they asked me to do the work of folding paper and recite the prison regulations. If I failed to remember them, I would be beaten with my head against the wall. Although folding paper was not heavy labor, it still made me dead tired. In the beginning, I was required to fold 700 sheets of paper a day, but later it was increased to 900 and then 1,200. I worked overtime until ten or twelve o’clock every night. Since I was slow in doing work, I had to work overtime if I couldn’t finish the task, which made me too sleepy to open my eyes. Afterward, even if I worked all night, I was still unable to finish it and then I would be beaten. Just like that, I worked every day, stayed up all night, and suffered beatings every now and then, which made me dizzy all day long. I felt I was just like a fool. During the imprisonment in the labor camp, my wife came to see me three times with our children. Every time I saw them, I couldn’t stop myself from crying. Seeing their desire for reunion in their eyes, I felt extremely sorrowful and indebted to them. I was unable to take care of them when they needed me most, and failed to perform the duty that a husband and a father should perform. But whenever I had such a thought, the Lord would enlighten me to remember the saints of the ages who were martyred for the Lord, which strengthened my faith and led me through the two years of hard labor.

I Was Arrested Again Several Months After Being Released

In August 2000, I was released. After returning home, I came back to the church and continued having meetings and serving the church with my co-workers. I thought that I could finally have meetings and sing hymns to praise God with my brothers and sisters. However, the CCP had never slackened its persecution of us. In order to keep us under their control, they restricted our freedom and did not allow us to believe in God. Under such a circumstance, they arrested us again.

On December 5, 2001, when I was having a meeting with my co-workers in a host family, the CCP evil cops broke in suddenly and blocked the doorway, shouting, “Nobody move!” After that, they searched wildly in the room and took away our Bibles, spiritual books, CDs, and the TV set of the host family, and then took the 16 of us to the police station. The next day, staff of the Political Protection Section came and took me and another co-worker to the detention house. Other brothers and sisters were released after being fined 2,000 yuan each. We two were shut in the prison and were interrogated four times respectively. During this time, I recalled my experience of being arrested last time, and then realized: However cruel they are, they can’t put me to death without God’s permission; with the Lord as my rear guard, I shall fear nothing. In the end, regardless of how they threatened and tempted me, the Lord kept me through it, and their schemes of using me to arrest brothers and sisters still did not succeed. Thank the Lord for His protection! They didn’t torture me this time.

A week later, the CCP again sentenced me to a year of hard labor on the charge of “disturbing the social order and taking part in a cult.” In the labor camp, I worked in the paper mill tearing paper, and I was required to tear several hundred kilos of books every day. If I couldn’t tear them down or meet their demands, I would be beaten. I also had to recite the prison regulations, and would suffer beating if I failed to remember them. What’s more, if I did anything unsatisfactory to them, I would also suffer beatings. Once, I refused to give the head of the cell my money. He flew into a rage and called several prisoners, and then they dragged me to the corner, hitting and kicking me fiercely. I was beaten black and blue, and was unable to get out of bed or have a meal for several days. However, the prison guard just paid no heed as if he didn’t see this. I prayed to the Lord Jesus every day in the prison, asking Him to give me faith to stand the testimony. A year later, I was released. When I returned home, the miserable condition of my family was so terrible. On rainy days, the roof would leak and there were few patches of dry ground left in the room, and the road in front of our gate was washed out long ago. Many times of the CCP’s “visiting” made my family, which was not rich originally, even more poverty-stricken, leaving my wife and children leading a hard life. My home was no longer like a home now, and the pain in my heart was beyond description. Under the persecution and attack of the CCP, I could do nothing but bury all my indignation in my heart and weep out my grief to the Lord.


From the several times of being arrested and tortured by the CCP, I personally experienced the atrocity of the CCP. I have seen clearly that the CCP is an evil party, the executioner, the devil who extremely hates the truth and opposes God, and even more the “beast” prophesied in Revelation. The CCP beautifies itself and builds up its name by deceiving the public, but it hates the truth in essence. In China, there is no freedom of religious belief at all. The CCP is heinous for cruelly suppressing the Christians, and its crimes are innumerable and maddening. Although I suffered a lot in the flesh, I thank the Lord for allowing me to have the most precious experience in my life and see through the reactionary substance of the CCP, which strengthened my will of rebelling against it and following the Lord to resolutely walk the way of the cross.

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